Wednesday, September 24, 2014

Cute Shit: Ridiculous Konglish Shirts

In Japan it's "Engrish"; in Korea it's "Konglish". You've seen it on the Internet for years, chuckling inwardly at how charmingly nonsensical it can be. 

Let me tell you, once you're in the middle of it, it's impossible to keep up with. Every single day there are multiple typos, terrible online dictionary translations, outrageous mispronunciations and the kind of stuff that forces you to ask yourself whether or not you're even sober. The kind of stuff they print on T-shirts. Yes, you realise, it was someone's job to design this and someone else's job to okay it and send it into production. 

As I said, it's impossible to immortalise them all; this post is the result of my being extra vigilant for ridiculous T-shirts for a couple of months and taking pictures with my phone while hovering like a bemused vulture until it started to get (more) awkward.

So you've got, for example, the apparently much-loved Korean tradition of simply ripping off not only designers (Kokon to Zai/ PYREX VISION in this case), but logos and famous characters:

(super creepy, right?)

This entire weird subcategory of nonsensical fashion magazine cover shirts:

Shirts that unexpectedly make you question and second-guess your life, criticise yourself or make pseudo-profound statements that frequently include typos:

Shit that's straight-up inappropriate and/or offensive that no one seems to notice and that even little kids sometimes wear:

(I kinda regret not buying more bubble tea from that guy, but I REALLY regret not spending $2 on the oversized second-hand Smokemon shirt..)

Then you've got all the fantastic shirts that just make absolutely no sense whatsoever. How hard it is to just Google or Naver something and use it when you don't give a shit about intellectual property rights or copywright infringement? "Too hard" is the resounding response given by these absurd novelty word soups:

No, that's the.. Pasta? 1927 is pasta? ... Oh dear, I've gone cross-eyed.

(The more I stare at the star one the more I regret not buying it, too.)

Finally, here's my personal collection, which also includes an uncomfortable but lovably ridiculous wool sweater I got from a thrift shop (Vin Prime) and wore maybe once just after coming here:


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